[Messages]

[phoebe_halliwell]

Is it true...are you really here?

Comments

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Phoebe.

Yes. I'm here.

Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

You're really Cole... as in Cole Turner? Because if you are a warlock or a demon just trying to make me twist and turn before you kill me...I will destroy you, I will. I will not allow the image of the man I love to be so fucking violated.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

It's me -- at least what's left of me after clawing my way out of the Wastelands.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

Clawing your way...

Oh God.

You must really hate me.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure what I feel, Phoebe. At first I fought to come back to you...and then I began to wonder if you wanted me back.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I think I need to sit down...oh wait, I am sitting down at this damn computer.

Are you Cole...the Source pretending to be Cole...or...?

I never stopped...I...

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Never stopped? Not even when you killed me?

Does it matter what I am now? I'm not even sure myself.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

*tears fill her eyes*

I had no choice. Do you think I wanted anything to happen to you? Do you think I enjoyed the fact that Piper and Paige had to hold me up while we vanquished the Source? Don't you think that if I had been able to find any other way to save you...to save us, I would have?

When the Source died and you vanished, I walked around that circle so many times. I had no idea...I didn't know what had happened to you. I cried for days...I stayed in my room and just sobbed. When the Seer stole our baby I wanted to die, damn it.

*shakes her head*

Maybe this was a bad idea. I shouldn't have bothered you. I'm sorry.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Wait. Don't...don't go.

My love for you is what kept me alive. Any other demon would've been utterly destroyed by the spell you and your sisters cast. But I'm half-human, and my soul wouldn't let go that easily. I wanted to come back to you.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I didn't want to...to do that spell, Cole.

My love is what finally made me do it. The Source was...destroying you.

Where do we go from here? What do we do now?

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

I haven't had the misfortune of running into Paige, but Piper's threatened me if I come near you. Not that I'm about to let her tell me what to do. What if it comes down to another choice between me and your sisters, Phoebe?


What if I'm still evil?

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I believe that there is good in you, Cole. You wouldn't have talked to me if there weren't. You wouldn't have come back if you weren't.

You're not still evil. The Source was evil...not Cole. Not my Cole.

...

We'll have to show them the truth...like we did before...

I don't know what will happen with you and I...but I know that not having you in my life was pain.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

*unconsciously lets out a sigh of relief*

You have no idea what it means to hear you say that. I never wanted to become the Source. I never wanted that power. I never wanted to hurt you or your sisters. I tried to fight it. I just wasn't strong enough.... But your sisters just condemned me and never tried to save me. After all I'd done to help them, that was my repayment. And dwelling on that while I was trapped in the Wastelands...wasn't pleasant.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I know you never wanted to become the Source, Cole, and no one could have been able to fight that much complete evil.

...I don't know what to say...you must have hated us so much while you were there.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Sometimes. Part of me knew you did what you had to do to protect yourselves and the world, but part of me hated you for abandoning me. I needed you....


I don't know what I am anymore, Phoebe. The Source is gone - I think - but I'm not human, either. I'm not Belthazor, but I absorbed a lot of demonic energy to escape the Wastelands.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I needed you, but I also needed to do what I thought at the time was right.

We could find out...if you even want my help after everything that has happened. I won't ask for anything more, Cole.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

And what if you don't like what you find? Or maybe you will. I tried to give up the powers of the Source, but you stopped me. Do your sisters know that? The Seer may have been influencing you, but we both know how drawn to evil you are. You feel its pull as much as I do, even now. Could you stay by my side? Or would you just kill me...again?

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

The only way I would try to kill you is if you did the same things that you did before...but I don't think that you will. You're not that man.

I don't know if they know, but I'll tell them.

Everyone feels the pull of evil, Cole. It's how we react to it that matters. As for how drawn to evil I am...apparently I have been predispositioned to it through various incarnations.

I won't let them kill you...but I won't let you kill them either.

For either of you to hurt the other...you'd both have to kill me first.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

I won't attack your sisters, but if they come after me, I will defend myself. I will not go gently to another vanquish.

You I could never hurt. Even after all this. I love you, Phoebe. And it was that love that let me fight the Source as long as I did. That's why he couldn't outright destroy you and your sisters - I wouldn't let him.

Whatever happens, I need you with me.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I would never ask you not to defend yourself. All I ask is that you don't attack first.

After everything...I do still love you, Cole. I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I do know that I love you and never stopped loving you.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

So what now? You bring me home for a tearful family reunion?

I need to see you. It's been so long since I've touched you....

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I need to see you...you could come here, or I could meet you somewhere.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

The manor may not be the best of ideas if your sisters may be around. And you don't want to come where I've been spending my time. Any ideas?

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I'm the only one that lives at the manor currently, but that could change in an instant.

I know every alley in San Francisco. Pick one and I'll meet you there. We'll decide where to go from there?

Or...the Town House is still vacant. I kept it.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

No. I've heard about your wanderings in dark alleys, and I won't have you putting yourself in danger like that.

The town house, however, is fine. When?

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

How could you have known about that?

The sooner the better.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Let's just say I've met someone who's been keeping an eye on you.

I agree. Tonight?

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

Yes, tonight. Meet me there?

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

I'll be waiting.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I'll be there as soon as I can get there. Please wait for me?

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

I've been waiting a long time. I can wait a little longer.

Re: Cole?

[seesthefuture.livejournal.com]

I'll be leaving soon and it'll be only a short walk if I take some of the short cuts.

Re: Cole?

[reformed-demon.livejournal.com]

Not if any of these shortcuts involve any alleyways frequented by demons.

I am leaving this place in a few moments. I'll be at the townhouse within an hour.